WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
