Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
