operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Fuck appropriateness.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
