So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
