Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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