Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I just sucked dick on a ferry
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize