The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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