Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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