I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
