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Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
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