really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Randomize