Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize