I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
