I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have started to decorate penises.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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