Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
