Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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