You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
