It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Randomize
