Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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