I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
