The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Shame is for Republicans.
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