he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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