walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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