what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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