His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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