Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
