Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
