we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
is wine microwaveable?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
