oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
