Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
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