I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Randomize
