and she was petting her beer can
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
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do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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