Only a mothe r could love this liver
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Randomize
