take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize