There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
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We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
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We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.