Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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