Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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