just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
