so that wasnt chicken after all
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
