Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize