hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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