I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
