youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
