Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
