Dual....:-)
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
