I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
