when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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