Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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