Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
