i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Randomize
