My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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